Becoming… well, me again

I signed my resignation papers yesterday and since it takes a while to process them, my last day at my current place of employment will be 11 March.

My brain has been trying to keep up with this process. And when there was just an endless drudge of working in this place ahead of me, I kept sleeping longer and longer nights. But ever since I talked to my supervisor and agreed on how to proceed, I have been feeling totally energised.

Before I started working in this place, and a little after it too, I didn’t need so much sleep. I used to sleep 5-7 hours a night and really well and I cannot remember that I ever took an afternoon nap. As I started working  I took it as something natural that since “I’m working now” I was more tired. Which is silly, because before that I was a full time student. But the difference was that I used my brain to something I loved when I studied, and that kept me energised. I have never loved my work, though there have been times I was comfortable enough in it.

So imagine my surprise when my mind is now eager to take on tasks it loves, instead of what it must do. Writing is exhausting sometimes. It really takes a bite out of me, but at the same time, I get so much pleasure from it that it evens the scale.

I only slept 6 hours last night. But instead of exhausted, I feel eager for the day.

The people who work I  places they love will think “duh”, and not everyone is lucky enough to have this kind of opportunity to start anew. I’ve always loved the feeling of getting lost in a new but fairly safe place. A new town, a new story. I feel like I’m now (to use a cliché) stepping in a new direction and I can’t really see through the fog what’s ahead of me, but there are friends and family to help me up if I stray into deep bog.

Love,

Maiju

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